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Other Excuses
  • "I forgot my red gloves"
  • "I couldn't see through my plastic opaque aeroscreen"
  • "I forgot to cut my fingernails"
  • "A GT3RS was holding me up for 1/2 the lap"
  • "My stickers started flapping and put me off"
  • "I was being courteous to the newbies"
  • "I was going sideways and looking cool, fast is for faggots"
  • "Got a fag packet stuck under the throttle pedal"
  • "I had to wait for Sabine so she could follow my lines"
  • "It's a Scoob"
  • "I set my back wing too high"
  • "I set my front splitter too low"
  • "It's a diesel"
  • "My circuit guide is out of date"
  • "I was constantly attempting to slide the fucker"
  • "I'm no longer insured on this track"
  • "That wasn't me you passed, I let my mate have a drive of the car, he's much slower than me"
  • "There was tree sap on the track"
  • "There was a fucking bus on the track"
  • "I didn't have a cigarette lighter"
  • "They moved the finish line"     Stripes - May 2006
  • "The seats are so high, and the steering wheel so strangely positioned that I cannot fit in"
  • "It doesn't have a limited slip diff as standard"
  • "I don't want to frighten my passenger"
  • "A water pipe split and sprayed coolant on a rear tyre"  
  • " I had the wrong music on the stereo"
  • "I had a fishtank on my passenger seat"
  • "MTV pimped my ride"
  • "My passenger was a fat cunt "   -   bobflemming
  • "My car wouldn't let me go faster due to the safety gadgets slowing me down"
  • "My winglets cancelled out my vortex generators"  -  GentleGiant
  • "I couldn't even go out on track as my wife made me sell my car and buy an ML320 diesel" 
  • "I had a loose tyre valve"  - Huge over-inflated ego - August 2007
  • "My feet were cold" - Dale
  • "We'd have smashed the record, but the track's all booked up for ages" - Ultima Sports Ltd, 2008
  • "I left the aircon switched on"  - Dale
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